1. |
||||
|
I’m a hoarder of antique mirrors
But I’d give them all away to just see what’s in front of me
The clutter of old love, it speaks to my fears
A broken home mistaken for a fortress through the haze of tears
And I’m trying not to drown
But these heirlooms always weigh me down
She’s shrouded in clouds, I saw a vision of a white gown
And I know I’ve made my bed
And some days I feel I’d be better off dead
But every now and then I hear a voice in head, it says:
カーテン開けて陽を浴びる
また目が痛くなる
やめない、絶対諦めない
光が命を繋ぐ
Death is approaching
Regret is encroaching
On a lifetime spent
Just wondering where all the good times went
Neither laughing nor crying
And neither living nor dying
I had blocked out the light
But I forgot that the sun shines even when my eyes are closed tight
Vanity is the killer of identity
I’m counting every blemish and I’m losing my humanity
Is youth wasted on the young?
Well it was wasted on me
Between the lines on my face you’ll read a tragedy
And all I wanted was some sympathy
I wanted to be worth the salvation they were offering
I couldn’t love myself so I just changed who “I” was
But that me couldn’t last forever
Beauty never does
カーテン開けて陽を浴びる
また目が痛くなる
やめない、絶対諦めない
光が命を繋ぐ
(心配しないで、過去忘れて
未来を見つめて
後悔、時間もったいない
幸せも痛みも共に)
Grasping harder at straws
I wanna drink every last drop
From the fountain
When I should be scaling mountains
But I’m sitting here, head in my hands
Help me to find the strength to stand
On my on two feet
Because alone I’m stumbling towards defeat
Breathe life into my lungs
Untie the noose around my neck
Inhale the present, exhale the past
This crystal ball is now broken glass
Help me escape from memory
And I’ll set this note back on the shelf
I just want someone to love me
I just want to learn to love myself
|
||||
2. |
||||
|
When you lay me to rest
Make sure you dress your best
I want to know that you were real
Want to remember how to feel
One last time before my coffin seals
I tried to conquer this disease
But it ended up conquering me
And yeah know I fucked up
But people like me, you know we really never conquer much
I spent years learning this language
もういらない
Just tell me you’ll be there to comfort me through sleepless nights
Months now my heart has been beating through my chest
It took me too long to realize that I was blessed
Every time I fell down
You were there to pick me up
Now I’m stuck on the ground
Or below it
教えて
(I pulled the string but not a word was said)
Yeah, even if it’s a lie
I want to hear you say it anyway
So when you lay me to rest
Remember to dress your best
Be my perfect little princess
As you lay me down into my casket
My perfect little princess
Skin porcelain white
Was it you that I loved or the doll that existed in my mind?
Every new wrinkle brought a tear to my eye
Now both the tears and the wrinkles are mine
|
||||
3. |
羽のない鳥 (Hane no Nai Tori)
04:27
|
|||
|
I shuffle and I shake
Awake
I’ve tried to sleep for days now but his presence is too much to take
Conducting from the shadows
He bends me until I break
“I could make it all work if you’d just let me concentrate!”
“I can wait”
He settles into place, controlling fate
She broke more than my heart so now there’s poison on the window pane
Ashamed, I try to salvage what I can from what remains
But he’s pulling even tighter on the reigns
Tell me, who is left to blame?
Weakened by the pain, but determined all the same
To finally cleanse myself of this curse that I’ve been forced to claim
The afterbirth at work, he still haunts me to this day
Have I done enough to drive him away?
Will it always be this way?
In the absence of wings
I cling to these strings
In his image I was designed
By his influence I’m defined
His contract is binding
Roots deep and winding
Intersecting with shame
Seasons change but I stay the same
Like a great tree that blocks my path
I once sought shelter in its shade
Now I will set myself free by sharpness of wit or sharpness of blade
And I will count its rings
One for every year of suffering
And yet he’ll never die
He’s been reborn so many times
He leads me to a lake
I gaze down and tears fill my eyes
My own worst enemy
I let my life pass me by
I see my reflection
I’m slain by my own hand
I was happy
And now I just am
Who will save me from myself?
I’m just a birdwatcher
No wings of my own
One by one they all fly away from home
Until I’m left here alone
I’ll reap what I’ve sown
|
||||
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